stop calling my apartment porn island.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
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