508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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