If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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