It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
i am craving dick and cupcakes