Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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