I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
