So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize