Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize