Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Randomize
