i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Dating After Heartbreak
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.