i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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