this just has baby written all over it
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
