Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up