Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
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Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
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Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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