Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
