Texts From Last Night

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  (616): View more from Michigan

  The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.

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  (616): The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes. http://tfl.nu/pvjr
  Replies (43) Good night (3505) Bad night (1160)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.

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  (765): I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan. http://tfl.nu/88ss
  Replies (182) Good night (1445) Bad night (4277)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?

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  (517): My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school? http://tfl.nu/rw32
  Replies (62) Good night (992) Bad night (4326)
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  (646): View more from New York

  jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times

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  (646): jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times http://tfl.nu/h14v
  Replies (12) Good night (4699) Bad night (946)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm

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  (954): I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm http://tfl.nu/muws
  Replies (8) Good night (3927) Bad night (1263)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today

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  (850): I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today http://tfl.nu/9m95
  Replies (18) Good night (4755) Bad night (1208)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings

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  (519): You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings http://tfl.nu/jmrv
  Replies (2) Good night (1664) Bad night (2749)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.

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  (301): My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it. http://tfl.nu/gp6s
  Replies (7) Good night (3256) Bad night (1184)
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  (772): View more from Florida

  He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...

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  (772): He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off... http://tfl.nu/s4wu
  Replies (3) Good night (1664) Bad night (1237)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.

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  (434): I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME. http://tfl.nu/rn1v
  Replies (12) Good night (2104) Bad night (951)
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  (575): View more from New Mexico

  Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.

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  (575): Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end. http://tfl.nu/gjro
  Replies (10) Good night (1601) Bad night (873)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE

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  (256): OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE http://tfl.nu/qfju
  Replies (7) Good night (2407) Bad night (743)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.

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  (832): I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement. http://tfl.nu/0r09
  Replies (1) Good night (690) Bad night (374)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.

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  (720): I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud. http://tfl.nu/er8q
  Replies (0) Good night (817) Bad night (347)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.

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  (602): Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name. http://tfl.nu/98wx
  Replies (2) Good night (661) Bad night (291)

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