I think I just saw someone hide a body.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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