goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?