I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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