Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
