Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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