The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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