Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
