Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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