1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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