just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
All I want is dick and wine.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
