Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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