Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize