Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.