sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like iHOP with fire
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize