Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize