Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
