Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
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