i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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