She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
