i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize