I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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