WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
vagina is talking i cant
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize