I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
