therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
She told me I should be a condom model.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
