I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize