I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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