why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I checked into jail on foursquare
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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