But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
