Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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