Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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