are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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