We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
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