You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Farmville is her only friend.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
My vagina just clenched in fear
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
