Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?